.Friday, September 11, 2009 ' 12:51 AM Y
job hunt 6
if God is collecting my tears, He would have increase His collection these few days. but self-pity is not the way out, so enuf of that! im 4 months nearer to my dream job! =)
just as you thought you graduated from a prestigious university call NUS, and at the graduation ceremony they said "the world awaits", its actually the other way round. You are waiting for the world to come "select" you. just as you tot you have experienced leadership and somewhat know abit abt organising things, planning things, executing things.. you are actually not really something.
the whole experience of job hunting is really a humbling experience for me. i would say my life is smooth-sailing, not much of a failure, in fact no major failure in my life. The only "failure" that i could think of is when i failed my social studies Os prelims by one mark! and i cried buckets that day in school. i have a high expectation on myself and always aim for the very best in terms of studies. somehow whatever i put in, i'll get the results. that explains my straight As in Os and As.
but when it comes to job hunting, the straight As seemed useless when it comes to job finding. whatever i put in is not what i get back! for every interview that i went, i prepared scripts for it! i spent days thinking through abt the possible questions and and research on the company. i memorise them and make sure i wake up an hr earlier to pray before the interview, i made sure i looked the best and dress the best for the interviews! im really trying and doing my best, what do my employers really expect from me? (frustrated!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
after i graduated, it seemed like my life is strucked with what i will term as "failure". 1stly, i failed my basic theory test, then 1st practical test, then the second one again. then whole load of stuff thats going on in the ministry. then now jobless till after all the interviews. to some of u, it might seem "chicken feet", but i would say this is the first taste of failures in my life, and its not that nice.
these failures are like the immunity boost for me as i enter into the marketplace. it might hurt now but they will definitely be useful defences next time. i just got to learn my way and navigate around. moral of story: allow yourself to fail sometimes.
ok all that seemed very demoralising. im fine, pls dun show me any special concern, just be normal, or else i'll justify myself to be in some pity-party.
i'll somehow pick myself up again. from past records, i've always been someone independent and able to get back on my feet kinda person. =) =) =) i might want to hide, to shun, to cry, to wallow, but i know i should not and its no use doing that. it has been my personal belief that "always trust in the wisdom of God's plan". it is still. i want to show the world what is strength.
My strength and my heart might fail but You are the strength of my heart. stay close to Him and nth will go wrong =)
